Etiquette 101: What NOT to say in the Americas

Etiquette 101: Smart Talk
by Boris Kachka | Published November 2009 | See more Condé Nast Traveler articles
http://www.concierge.com/cntraveler/articles/501931

THE AMERICAS
Several quirks of geography and economic development have shaped this hemisphere's sensitive areas (we shouldn't say "taboos"; compared with much of the world, it's a pretty easygoing place). Catholicism is more deeply rooted in some countries than in others, and very liberal nations (Brazil) coexist with others that consider themselves the peak of propriety (Chile). And then, of course, there is Latin America's proximity to the United States and the desire to demonstrate equal standing. Finally, in the case of Canada, there's the desire to prove itself a bit apart from the noisy neighbor who insists on dominating so much of the conversation.

ARGENGTINA
Absolutely verboten: The Dirty War and the "disappeared" of the 1970s, definitely still a deep trauma in the nation's psyche, are not to be referenced casually. Radioactive: The Peróns, whose legacy is much debated. You never know how an Argentine will feel about them.
Definitely not: The Falklands War may seem like an amusing '80s footnote, even to Brits—but certainly not to the nation that lost.
Not a good idea: The economic crises of the past several years, for which many hold the International Monetary Fund and American policies responsible.
Ill-advised: Lumping Argentina in with all of Latin America (many Argentines believe that they stand apart from the rest of the continent).
Talk away! Argen­tina as unique within the continent; its prosperous past (if not present). And most middle-class people have therapists and love to talk about them.

CANADA
Absolutely verboten: Impugning Canada's national health-care system. Canadians are fiercely proud of it. In a television contest, viewers voted the founder of the system the greatest Canadian hero.
Radioactive: Remarking how similar Canada is to the United States can be tantamount to calling it the fifty-first state.
Definitely not: Any reliance on a few stereotypes (e.g., making fun of how they say, "Eh?") may unearth the sarcasm beneath their (stereotypical) politeness.
Not a good idea: Be careful in discussing Toronto and how wonderful it is; many regional Canadians, especially out west, don't like it.
Ill-advised: Don't mistake politeness for the casual oversharing so common in the United States. Canadians, like Europeans, will bristle if you get too personal too fast.
Talk away! Hockey—they really do love it as much as we think they do. The runner-up in the Canadian-hero contest was a hockey coach turned sportscaster.

BRAZIL
Absolutely verboten: Dwelling on money, whether fussing over how to split the check ("People will think you're greedy," says Brazilian-American Paulo Padilha) or asking what someone does for a living.
Radioactive: Bringing up the level of violence or constantly asking if it's safe to go out. There surely are many problems, but it's not something to harp on.
Definitely not: Padilha cites the rule, "No politics or football at the dinner table." As a foreigner, you can bring up soccer—politics, not so much.
Not a good idea: Making light of Catholicism: Brazil may be a fairly liberal country, but even an urban sophisticate may be a deeply devout Catholic—no Vatican jokes, please.
Ill-advised: Commenting crudely on women, which can get you into hot water as a gringo.
Talk away! Music is universally beloved, so praising Brazilian song, or even asking if your acquaintance can recommend an artist, is always a good idea.

CHILE
Absolutely verboten: The dictatorships of either Augusto Pinochet (on the right) or Salvador Allende (on the left), about whom opinions are passionate and vary widely.
Radioactive: How great a time you had in Argentina. Chileans can be a bit touchy about their internationally acclaimed neighbor to the east Definitely not: And their other neighbors—Peru and Bolivia—with whom they had territorial clashes in the nineteenth century.
Not a good idea: Sex or toilet humor, without prompting—despite its modern gloss, Chile is one of the more conservative countries in Latin America.
Ill-advised: Pisco as a Peruvian drink. Though it really is, the Chileans consider the liqueur to be a source of native pride.
Talk away! Chile's rolling hills; its wineries; and the cleanliness and modernity of Santiago.

MEXICO
Absolutely verboten: Crime and corruption: It's sure to be a topic of discussion, but it's not something you should bring up in a cavalier way.
Radioactive: As in Spain, bullfighting is a matter of cultural pride, so stumping for animal rights may not win you many friends.
Definitely not: Immigration is a fact of life, but the United States'  wonderpolicy on illegals is a sore point—and sometimes a humiliating one.
Not a good idea: Mexico is still a strongly Catholic country, which means religious and social questions are best approached delicately, particularly in rural areas.
Ill-advised: In general, getting down to business before coffee, even during a quick business lunch, is considered rude.
Talk away! Always talk about marriage or family. Knowledge of Mexico's cultural heritage and food (not Tex-Mex) will go a long way, as will familiarity with such family rites as the quinceañera.

MY THOUGHTS
some cultures can really be sensitive.  i wonder if we appear the sameto others?